The option is now available to me to toggle! it is no longer greyed out.
A bit about the circumstances of my case:
- Phone was provided by Telus in Canada.
- The phone was brand new, unboxed by me. I tried everything in the question for 2 days after unboxing. Then I left it on my desk to just sit there and I never played with it, I didn't charge it, hell, I didn't even look at it for about 7 to 10 days.
- Over the first few days, I never used the phone and I never put a sim in it longer than 5 minutes.
- I got nowhere with Telus tech support. I explained to Telus tech support, and 2nd level support until I was blue in the face that:
Carrier variants of Pixels use the same stock OS and firmware with a non-zero carrier id flashed onto the persist partition in the factory. The carrier id activates carrier-specific configuration in the stock OS including disabling carrier and bootloader unlocking. The carrier may be able to remotely disable this, but their support staff may not be aware and they probably won't do it. Get a carrier agnostic device to avoid the risk and potential hassle. from https://grapheneos.org/install/web#prerequisites
I put this whole mess on ice as I got busy with other stuff. Since the phone was brand new it wasn't fully charged, and since the phone was left laying around my desk, it powered off as the battery ran out. From the time I opened the phone to now it has been about a week or 10 days or so.
Right now I plugged in the power, and the OEM unlock was still greyed out. I connected it to wifi (as I did a factory reset so many times that the wifi credentials were not in the phone). Then I did a restart of the phone... you know, just a power cycle, and BOOM!!!! OEM unlock was no longer greyed out, and I was able to toggle it.
My best guess is that the following played a role in this "miracle":
- when I powered the phone on I connected to wifi, and did an update.
- I had Telus perform a carrier unlock on their side.
- Developer mode was always enabled.
- I reconnected wifi after 7 to 10 days, and did a restart. I believe the phone connected to a google server, and allowed this option to become available.
Looks like you just have to connect to the internet, make sure the unit is carrier unlocked, and then wait.
Good luck to everyone with this issue, hope this helps.